Tanzania:For His Glory

(July 2014)

I waited years and years to go to Africa. I found out when I was 14 years old that God wanted me out of everybody to go to Africa! It was an exciting day. Well the day finally came when I was 20 years old and I found an organization whose beliefs I agreed with and respected. Then I found a five week trip to go on. Going on that trip meant I had to quit my job and leave all certainty to God. I gladly quit my job and pursued that trip. It was not easy though. I was giving up control.

            The day came. I was finally flying out to go to Tanzania, Africa. What did God have in store for me?? I was so excited. I was thinking of all the help I could do. I was thinking of what wonderful things God would do. He would save hundreds, and I would be involved!! No. That is not what happened.

            I arrived to Tanzania. I was with two of my team members. We were about to meet the rest. We all got along. I did not see too much conflict at first. I liked everybody, and the feeling seemed to be mutual. I was paired up with a Lucienne Elias. She was a very sweet young lady with a huge heart and confidence in our Savior. She was strong. She and I had the opportunity and privilege to stay with Gideon and Rachel Mashuri. They had three beautiful children: Abigail, Sara, and Deborah. Gideon and Rachel were from the Congo; therefore, Lucienne and I had a true African experience living with actual Africans. It was such a joy to be with them. The conversations we had were deep, personal, and loving. We had fellowship with one another and so quickly. The reason is because we all had the Holy Spirit combining us. We all had a similar desire, to love God with all our hearts, with all our minds, and with all our soul. We were also interested in seeing the Rangi, the Tanzanian tribe we lived among, saved. We wanted to see them won to Christ.

            I wanted to do whatever I could to help these people come to know who Christ was and what He had done for them. I came to a crashing halt when there was nothing I could do. I was so humbled. Rather than helping the Rangi out, I needed their help. I could not speak their language. I did not know their way of life. I could barely cook the way they did. I did not know.

            Abasi and Arafa and their children, who are Rangi, are whom I stayed with for three days. They brought me to their house. They gave me a bed to sleep on and plenty of food to eat. Arafa became my friend. She being the woman of the house took me everywhere with her. She taught me how to garden yucca or casava. I also had the opportunity to help her plant sunflowers, peanuts, and more yuccas. She taught me some of her language as I taught her some of mine. She also tried to teach me how to cook. That did not last for long. She did many things for me, and I barely did anything for her or so I thought.

            I cannot tell how much it hurt me to be the one needing help instead of giving it. It hurt so much that for the first time in my life, I was angry at God. I could not wrap my mind around why He would send me so far from home to do nothing. Why would He make me wait six years to be helped rather than to help? I couldn’t help but think of all those who were with me from the beginning of this whole Africa thing. I couldn’t help but think of how disappointed they would be to know that I had not done a thing. I was hurt.

            God seemed to be quite quiet. I would fall to sleep every night hoping for all of this to be over. I wanted to go home to my family, to my church, and to a place where I felt needed. My heart broke at every thought of going home. This was not because I missed home so much. No, it was because I realized I was not putting God first. He taught me that I was unwilling to leave my family, to forsake them for His glory. I couldn’t do it. I wouldn’t do it. It was like I began wrestling with God, and He has now bruised my side.

            I would like to tell you more of the trip, but there is not much more to tell. Sure I have funny stories here and there. I had the opportunity to share and I did. Really I could tell you more, but I don’t want to. I want you rather to hear what God is saying in all this.

            While in Africa, God revealed to me that I am selfish, prideful, and unaware of my flaws. He broke me because He loves me. He gently pointed out that I am unfaithful, weak, and poor in spirit. He knows of my many flaws, but not one of them matters to Him. HE is the one saving people. HE is the one who convicts. HE is the one who judges. This is God’s job. The Holy Spirit does this. He says my job is to be a servant. He wants me to give all over to Him. He commands me to trust in Him for everything!! Not just my food, shelter and water but my strength, love, and richness as well. “Seek first His kingdom and these things will be added to you.”(Matthew 6:33).

            Tanzania was nothing I had expected, but everything God wanted it to be. Why would God call me to go at 14? My answer is this: He wanted me to pursue Africa so He could show me how little I am without Him.  God appeals to us at our levels. He gives us the best possible chance to choose Him. God does not need me, and I know that now. But God still wants me. To be wanted is better than to be needed.

            Maybe my struggle will help encourage another even if it is just one. God continues to pour into my life and He cares.  So, why did God call me to Africa when I was 14? Now that He has shown me who I am without Him, will I pursue further that call? Yes, Africa was not what I expected, but Africa is what I needed. God’s story in my life is not yet finished.

-Jojo